How to part ways, The Right Way – Does Loyalty Pay #8

The right wayFor once I can write as the positive contrarian on a topic.   Having only been at two different companies in the past 27 years and with my current employer 15+ I can actually say, Loyalty does pay!

Unlike some topics if you do a Google search on ‘how to quit a job’ many hits will be returned. Loyalty has gone out the window completely when it comes to sticking with a job. Rather than writing on something already well covered, if you find yourself in a position of no choice, be sure to read the ins and outs of the right way to go. Most importantly, whether the quitter or quittee, never burn bridges.   You never know when a buyout will come or some day that employee could be a customer or partner.

From this Average Joe’s view I have seen that loyalty is a two way street. If you find a place with a history of treating you right, it is not worth getting a bit better salary elsewhere.   No employer is going to be perfect, you will always have things that you think should be done differently. And there will always be a boss that you don’t see 100% eye to eye with.   If the best you can get is a lateral movement with a slight increase then stay where you are. Only if an advance is provided (and you have no chance of getting a promo where you are) is there an exception to the rule.

I don’t normally want to tout my resume, but this is one time where I can stand as a strong authority. Loyalty pays.   The company I work for today had only its second layoff in history not too long ago. No fault of theirs completely, just some market changes forced consolidation of roles.   I actually tried to get a lay off option.   I believe as we have had a very strong reciprocal relationship, I couldn’t even get myself fired.   Things worked out in the long run better for the person I tried trading with. Staying ended up being the best for me and my family as well. Offers came in to do other things without my asking for them. After weighing out the options I felt loyalty from this end was most in order.

I also had a recent church experience. I almost hate to invite anyone that is not already in complete church agreement to enter The Portico. But if you want, enter and hear the story of how to leave a church the right way

 


DO YOU DARE TO CROSS INTO THE PORTICO?


If you think that leaving the church you belong to is no big deal, then I would seriously evaluate your commitment to begin with. The #1 gain in belonging to a family is identity with your upbringing, which if you all are loyal to one another provides protection, hopefully love, and a bond that should not be broken.   Because the family has broken down, people don’t recognize this basic concept.

Therefore the radical statement Jesus made By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another” (John 13:35), is not understood.

The church today has lost its voice and identity because Christians have little commitment to one another. Church has become a social club and entertainment center in many circles.   Our proof of commitment to God is proven in our commitment to other people in the Christian family.

This probably sounds like ridiculousness to some. Why would I want to be committed to a bunch of people I am not related too? And some of them are pretty weird at times. Well guess what, if you claim to be a Christian, you are now related via the same Father.

If you don’t get that, I’m not sure what else can be communicated. But I do understand that it happens all the time and people are shocked if one dares to question how much they participate in the church they attend. (if they attend one period).

About a year ago our family did have to make that tough decision to depart from our church family of four years. We did not take it lightly and took over a year before making a final decision.   Through the process it was like going through a divorce.   Yes sometimes God may be calling you to move to another place.   If that time comes, Google the right way to leave a church, there are once again plenty of good tips.

For us it was heart-wrenching. But the decision was made via several meetings with board members and the new lead Pastor before going. We involved no others than those who had authority and left out other staff and anyone not in our close circle of people.  People face enough negative and challenges to their faith, if you are in such a decision faze, keep it close to the vest.  Most people had no idea we were gone for several months apart from those who we had in our small groups. The only others we communicated with were people that had already left. Not that we were looking for additional validation on certain topics, but there were some things in common that did help us make a thorough decision.

In the end it came down to some directional differences and God made it very obvious to us.   Fortunately or not fortunately depending on how you view it large churches have to have tight structure on some things to accommodate a large membership.   Because of that, and primarily for that reason, we saw that direction wise for our gifts to be used to the fullest a change needed to be made. Sure we had things that we think could be done differently (just like with any job), but none of those factored in the equation.  Each could have been overcome easily.

Unlike the first and only other time we left a church, all was handled with full respect from both sides. To this date we maintain positive communications with those whom we had those discussions and we especially support the leader of that church. I don’t know where God will take that in future years, but should He say go here with them again, I know from our side it would not be uncomfortable to re-unite and I trust the same attitude is present on the other side.

That is the right way.   It is easy to talk of the importance of commitment from the pulpit as it is of monumental importance to the bottom line and keeping up attendance. This Average Joe thinks it needs to be mentioned from the bottom up more than from the top. I have zero to gain personally. But I know who it is that I follow, my accountability to Him is where I make my decisions and speak in defense of.  How about you?   

Please note: I reserve the right to delete comments that are offensive or off-topic.

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